Concerns For A Friend… No More

Remember the post that I made a while back about concerns for a friend? I feel like I should take it back…

I thought all this drama was behind us. Aparently not. Turns out she, once again, verbally attacked one of those friends that she treated horribly and unfriended and now they think I said something to her (even though I haven’t talked to her since our fall out in July). It’s one thing to hurt me… I’ll be OK and will even forgive those that hurt me. However, if anyone attacks my friends… you seriously need to watch out.

This girl seriously needs some mental help. I really can’t figure out what happened to her and I feel sorry for her husband for having to put up with such an emotional monster. If anyone talks about starting a family or someone being pregnant, she gets super jealous and tells them they’re going to be horrible parents. I know, from watching at a distance, she has mommy issues, but that is just extremely immature to do. If I find out she says anything about me or my family, I will sue her. If she contacts me by any means, I will get a restraining order. For all I know, she belongs in an insane asylum now. But what I find most ironic is how she said that I act like a child that has been pinched while in arguments. While I do have my moments of being pinched, at least I don’t act like a 2 year old who happens to have a big vocabulary every day of my life.

As for my friend, she still isn’t speaking to me. But I hope one day she’ll let me tell her that I did not talk to this girl who has screwed up our lives with her drama. I would *NEVER* betray someone like them to an insane person like that…

*sigh* She used to be such a nice girl… I just don’t understand what went wrong…

Mystery Solved

Today I had a check up with my doctor and another ultrasound. The baby has a new nick name, Jumping Bean – Bean for short. I got a huge show at the ultrasound today! Every time the ultrasound lady tried to take a picture, it kept jumping, making it hard to get a clear shot. Lol. We did manage to get a few good ones. It also kept waving it’s arms any time I talked which was really cute. ^_^

We did finally find out what cause the bleed that I had a few weeks ago. It is a subchronic hematoma – a blood clot between the placenta and the uterine wall. Fortunately the one on the left side has stopped bleeding and looks like it’s starting to be reabsorbed. The one on the right is 75% done bleeding and is in the healing process. This would be the cause of the remaining spotting that I’ve had (fortunately it’s getting better every day).

Even after looking at the ultrasound at the hematomas, my OB seemed much happier than last week. I’m still no where in the clear, but with the clots healing and being reabsorbed, things are starting to look better. I still have a 50/50 chance though so I’m stuck on pelvic rest until further notice and probably will be for a long time. It kind of sucks, but it’s no where near as bad as bed rest. Lol. I’ll take pelvic rest over bed rest any day! Haha.

Not Out of the Woods Yet… But Close!

Things have been going a bit better since my last post. I visited Dr Choudhry for my 8 wk appointment (that was scheduled before this whole issue) and everything still looks great! She even took me off bed rest and put me on pelvic rest. The difference – I can leave the house and go to work. I can also go shopping but only for a few hours (no all day trips to the mall) and do light house chores like dishes and laundry. I’m not allowed to pick up anything over 15lbs though so James still has to bring the laundry upstairs for me, and the cat food, and do some other chores like vacuum and mow (which sucks cause I like mowing the lawn lol). All things considered, it’s been a decent week.

Unfortunately I’ve still had a bit of spotting but my doctor said she couldn’t find anything wrong or where it even came from. The cervix is still closed and doesn’t look agitated. I thought it might have been a cut somewhere since the ultrasound at the ER hit something and it felt like it hit an open wound or cut, alas, nothing is visible. So whatever is still making an issue must be very small and isn’t a major threat.

Today I start my 9th week. It kind of scares me. Last time I actually miscarried in the 9th week and didn’t even know it until 2 weeks later (my body didn’t get the memo). I had told everyone for Christmas (parents and friends) that I was pregnant when actually I had miscarried the week before christmas. After that, this week really freaks me out.

We thought about not telling anyone until May, when my first trimester was over with. But having the complications that I did, we felt it best to share so people wouldn’t worry. And even though everything seems to be going OK, I’m still not super excited yet. We do appreciate all the congrats and prayers though. I probably won’t enjoy anything until almost the middle of the second trimester when things are more established. I haven’t even thought of room decor or baby items and probably won’t until I’m more certain things will turn out OK.

Speaking of items, I don’t even know if I’ll get to have a baby shower. Most of my friends are scattered across the country now. And with my luck, no one ever comes to my parties. Few people my age were able to attend my bridal shower and no one ever seems to come to my birthday parties anymore. Regardless, I’ll still probably make a list for those that do actually wish to send us stuff. I’ll be slowly collecting small things (of course ) but I’ll put bigger items on the list. However, money in general is always nice. Lol. We are trying to pay off as much debt as possible before the baby comes so we do like money. Lol.

Well, it’s getting to be my bed time as I have work in the morning. I can’t stay up as long as I used to. I get tired sooner now. Can’t wait for that to wear off (in like 5 years… maybe lol). Will post pics soon. They’re on my FB page if you’d like to see some now though. Night!

Here’s What’s Going On

*WARNING – THIS MAYBE SLIGHTLY GRAPHIC*

This last week I’ve posted that I’ve been put on bed rest by my doctor and many of you have actually responded and asked me what is going on. So, here’s the scoop on what’s going on.

About 2 weeks ago, I found out James and I are on attempt #2 of having a kid – yes, that means I am pregnant again. I had my first check up on Monday the 26th. Everything is so much better than last time.

Baby #1 @ first visit:
• Heart Rate: 58
• Size measured 1 wk behind

Baby #2 @ first visit:
• Heart Rate: 133
• Size measured perfectly on schedule.

So things were going much better than last time but we were still cautious about it. And we had a right to be after what happened last time.

On Saturday I had the strangest dream. I was walking around an abandoned shopping center that had a Walmart. I was by the auto center outside and some teen guy in a hoodie came at me and punched me in the lower abs. Naturally I freaked out as that can cause a miscarriage. Then, I woke up.

Naturally I was very curious why I just dreamed what I did, so I went to check on things. Sure enough, there was a decent amount of blood, just like the beginning stage of a miscarriage. My dream was telling me that I might be having or just had a miscarriage.

After my findings I woke James up and we went downstairs to talk. I told him what was going on and we decided that we’d take another hit on our debt and go to the ER even though I was sure of what was going on. Turns out, I’m glad that we went. Things weren’t quite as bad as we thought.

So I get to the ER and the cramps started, but only on my right side. They never got bad. Just annoying. Then the ER doctor came in and did an exam by sight. All he saw was blood and clots, but that was it. Cervix was still closed which was a good sign. So they sent me for an ultrasound.

I get to the ultrasound room and went to the bathroom. In that moment, I lost so much blood, I knew there was no way the fetus would still be there. But when I went back and they did the ultrasound… It was still there! And to make it even more confusing, it was doing even better than on Monday! Heart rate was 166 and measured right on time. It was in a good spot and overall looked perfect… yet I was still bleeding. They put me on bed rest for the next three days, until I could get to my OB.

I call my OB Monday morning and schedule a follow up appointment. I had 1 very minor spot since Saturday so I thought things were going good, though I thought for sure the ultrasound would agitate it and probably make me bleed again (until about 12 wks, they have to use the vaginal ultrasound).

I get to the doctor and we do the ultrasound. Again, the baby is doing great! Heart beat at 176 (goes up to about 180 for a few weeks before coming back down) and now measuring about 2 days ahead of schedule. Looks perfect – legs and arms with fingers and toes budding and everything. But when I get to the room to see the doctor, sure enough, I start to bleed again – just like I thought. The doctor wasn’t happy though.

After doing her exam she looks at us sternly and says that I am still on bed rest. I looked at her and asked how long. She shook her head and shrugged. I asked about work – all I do is sit at a computer. She said no. Could I go to the movies and sit? No. Could I do anything other than sit? No. I’m only allowed to walk from room to room to get a drink and go to the bathroom. Otherwise, I am to be sitting.

It really depressed me when she said I couldn’t go to work. That’s the only thing worry about. Fortunately I can work from home, but it’s harder and less efficient. However, if everything is better by next Tuesday, she said she might let me go back to work.

So here I am, stuck on the couch, watching TV and browsing the internet on my birthday with no party in sight. I did wonder about eating out though. So I called and asked about going out to eat for my birthday. She said that as long as I didn’t see anything or feel any cramps, I could go. So at least I was able to go out and eat today for my birthday.

So there you have it. All has been revealed. I will try to keep everything updated. We would appreciate prayers. According to my doctor, this pregnancy only has a 50/50 shot of making it so all prayers and thoughts are welcome.

I will post pictures of the ultrasounds later for everyone to see.

~Janaye

Me & My Valentine

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone! Got any fun plans for tonight? I hope so! James and I are going to ballroom class. We’re actually celebrating V-day on Saturday since V-day is, obviously, on a Tuesday and we both have to work.

Anyway, I was giving it a thought about how long I’ve been with my amazing husband. And I mean, how long from the beginning. I’ve known him for 9 years! NINE! It feels like it’s only been 2! Haha. Guess time flies when you’re having fun.

James and I actually met on Saturday February 1, 2003 after my ballet class. That was the first time I saw him. I still remember his shaggy hair and the way he smelled. ^_^ *happy sigh* Our first date was to see “Kangaroo Jack” (seriously, no other good movies out at the time…). Then we walked around the neighborhood and then talked for hours. Well… I did most of the talking, but he seemed to love it. Haha. Then, when it came time to say good night, as he was getting in the car, I asked if I could give him a hug. My how he flew back out of that truck!! HAHA! And it was the most meaningful hug I had ever had at that point. And we hugged for about 5 minutes. I wished so hard that it would never end.

I guess I got my wish as I can have one of those amazing hugs when ever I want now. I married my first (and only) boyfriend! Thinking about all our dates still makes me giggle and feel all excited. I’m so glad I found the perfect one for me right from the start.

So today, I wanted to share what I call my “Valentine Photo.” Just take a look at it below. Do you see something special in the picture? (besides us of course haha)

(c) HA! Photography/Heather Ahrens

Furball Feature – Sara

I was going through some photos and I think that maybe once a month I’ll let you know a little more about the Melshas and the Crazy 8.

February’s Feature is a Furball Feature of Sara. Sara was, I think, the 3rd one born of the 4 that are siblings. She was named Sara for “Sara Plain and Tall” as she had such a flat dull grey when she was born. Obviously, she’s not so dull and boring anymore; actually I think she’s probably the prettiest furball we have.

Sara is a very loving, very affectionate kitty. She loves to curl up and cuddle with you on the couch after running around the house for several hours. She also loves laying on the couch or on the cat bed and occasionally (more so when she was a kitten) will lay with her elbows and arms stretched out. This is where she gets the nick name “Silly Sara.” (See photo below of when she was a kitten haha). Her favorite toys are fluffy strings and anything with feathers though she does enjoy a good chase of the laser pointer.

Another thing Sara loves is heights. She loves the cat tree and has taken a liking to sitting on James’ (or even my) shoulders. She loves it so much that she’ll sit on our shoulders while we walk around. If she’s not on you and you lean over, she will jump on your back and lay down like you were a cat bed. I really think she just wants to cuddle.

Enjoy the pics of Little Miss Sara, our not-so-plain Furball Feature.

My First Design

I finally got down and took photos of my first ever product! This is my first 100% designed label that’s made it to the product. This wine is only available in Texas and only at the winery “The Barrel House.”

I really enjoyed making this label. The owner was very open to ideas. All she wanted was the crinkle paper in the background. She had liked the look on another label and wanted to see what I could come up with. So I wanted to create an elegant label for some classy ladies at the winery. And this is what I came up with. Made with 2 colors and 1 foil to help keep costs down.

This label’s name was inspired by the owner’s granddaughter that called dandelions wish blossoms. It’s a real cute story and I’m so happy I got to make this as my first official label design. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Tough Challenges & Meeting Goals

I love meeting goals. I just don’t always like the process.

My current personal goal is to lose some weight. Before I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism, Hashimoto’s Disease and ahemiagenesis of the thyroid I was a slender 110lbs and I loved it. I could wear what ever I wanted and I looked great. In the summer of 2006, though, I noticed I started to gain weight. I knew I wouldn’t be pencil thin forever but it started packing on really quickly, at least for me. Then, my OB/GYN at the time noticed a small goiter (swollen thyroid) and that’s when the trouble started. It took 3 Endocrinologists to figure out the problem and a 4th to find another problem that’s related.

Hypothyroidism is when the thyroid slows down or stops making enough T3 and T4. This slows down your metabolism and generally causes weight gain. In some case extreme weight gain. For example, someone who has hypothyroidism could potentially put on 100lbs in just a year. Fortunately for me I do not have any extreme issues as far as hypothyroidism is concerned but it does make it really easy for me to put on weight. Another issue of hypothyroidism is infertility. Because it messes with endocrine system (hormones basically) it can cause a woman to be low on different hormones and as a result cause infertility. If it is under control through medication, in fertility is usually not a huge issue and other symptoms can be controlled as well. After having achieved being pregnant I am certain that I do not have infertility issues.

Hashimoto’s Disease is an autoimmune disease where the body thinks the thyroid is a foreign object and attacks it. This often causes what is called a goiter, or swelling of the thyroid. Sometimes with a goiter it makes it really hard to swallow. I’ve always had an issue with swallowing so I’m not sure how much is mental, physical, or the goiter.

The funniest thing, though is the ahemiagenesis of the thyroid. This is where a lobe of the thyroid is missing; usually the left (reason why the left one is the most common to be missing is unknown). It took 3 Endocrinologist to figure out that one. Having this puts me in a 0.02% of Hypothyroid patients alone. Having a combination of all three puts me in even more of a rare category. (See, mom, you always knew I was special. Lmao)

So with these fun challenges, it’s been really really hard to lose weight. In January I finally lost 4lbs; the first bit of weight loss I’ve had since 2006 and a start to my goal! Some of it I’m sure was “baby weight” from the pregnancy that went away after the D&C but the rest was all me. Lol. The reason I’m sure I lost the weight was because my new Endocrinologist put me up a level on the levothyroxine. And after the test results came back from my last blood test, I’d say it was probably mostly the meds as it put me in the hyperthyroid range.

I am trying to help my meds along by counting calories, cutting down on carbs and exercising more. Since I’ve lost those 4lbs I haven’t lost anymore. But hey, at least it’s not a gain, right? I know eventually one day, with the help of some endocrinologists and nutritionists I will be able to make the weight, my goal, that I’d like to be at.

Putting Out Feelers

Aren’t the flowers James got me yesterday so pretty? I absolutely love them! So naturally, I had to take a picture.

So today I started putting out some minor feelers back into the design world. I love working at Hart Label, but they can’t offer me full time. As it is I hardly have enough stuff to do being part time. But with how much debt we have and need to pay off, I really need to get a full time job with better pay. Benefits would be awesome but I really just need full time.

While I need to get a better paying job, I feel bad for looking. They hired me thinking I’d be there for several years. I haven’t even been there a full year yet. But I just can’t keep going with the low hours. If they could give me enough work and have me there full time, I’d be more than happy to stay, but it’s just not possible. With only 1 pressman, 1 sales person, 1 accountant and 1 designer, there’s just no way we can increase how much we print. As it is the poor pressman is swamped while I sit in my office twiddling my thumbs waiting for *something* to do. So it’s just not in the cards. I really thought that things might pick up and I’d do full time there, but it’s just impossible.

So now I am putting out some feelers and hopefully some one will get back to me and maybe I can finally find my “home” for where I’m going to stay for a while.

Workin’ On Stuff

I’ve been meaning to get better with my photography. I’ve been taught that the best photography doesn’t use filters and Photoshop Actions but I’ve come to realize that some of my favorite ones have been through filters or actions. So I’ve decided to start trying to use more of them.

For now I’ve purchased a few actions that are very complex (and saves about 30 minutes of editing time). My goal, in my spare time, is to learn exactly what these actions do, how to create it with out running the action and how to use them and tweak them to make my own style. I’ve always loved the very light style in photos, so that’s what I’m going for.

Speaking of working on stuff, James and I have decided to overhaul the office. James got a new computer for his birthday and so he needed a desk. The only way to get a desk in there is to basically do an overhaul and purge of the office. Every time we move, the office is “the dump” area. If we don’t know where something goes, we throw it in the office. This way it’s out of the way and the cats can’t get to it.

Not anymore! This past weekend we started the overhaul process. We bought James a desk and set up. It’s already saved us space! We also purchased a nice filing cabinet that is big enough to hold James’ tower (computer) and the printer as well as giving me more space for filing which I am in great need of. The filing cabinet also frees up two boxes in our closet which is really packed. This will make it easier for this weekend when James has to clean out the closet and put in shelves. He’s building a custom shelving system in the small closet which will give us more storage options and get this horribly broken plastic three drawer thing out of the closet. I have so many ideas on how to organize so I’m pretty excited. This also means that we will be able to find everything that we want to give to Goodwill and actually be able to drop off the stuff next weekend instead of it sitting in our office.